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Wednesday, April 13, 2005

BORN TO WALK

Bruce Springsteen, now environmentally-aware, re-writes his old hits …

Original Bruce:

She’s a hot-stepping Hemi with a four on the floor
She’s a Roadrunner engine in a ‘32 Ford
Late at night when I’m dead on the line
I swear I think of your pretty face when I let her unwind

New improved Green Bruce:

She’s a slow-moving hatchback with continuously-variable transmission
She’s a gas-electric hybrid producing zero emissions!
Late at night, battery power’s restored
I swear I think of your pretty face when I plug in the cord

Original Bruce:

In the day we sweat it out in the streets of a runaway American dream
At night we ride through mansions of glory in suicide machines
Sprung from cages out on highway 9,
Chrome wheeled, fuel injected
and steppin’ out over the line
Baby this town rips the bones from your back
It’s a death trap, it’s a suicide rap
We gotta get out while we’re young
‘Cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run

New improved Green Bruce:

In the day we sweat it out in the streets ‘cos climate change is melting the ice
At night we ride to Greenpeace fundraisers in a bio-fuel mass-transit device
Sprung from depots out on highway 9,
Hemp-wheeled, full of hippies
and toein’ the envirofreak line
Moby this town rips the cress from your salad
It’s a crap song, it’s an unlistenable ballad
We gotta get loud now we’re old
‘Cause gramps like us, baby we were born to scold

Original Bruce:

Well, I had the carburetor, baby, cleaned and checked
With her line blown out she’s hummin’ like a turbojet
Propped her up in the backyard on concrete blocks
For a new clutch plate and a new set of shocks
Took her down to the carwash, check the plugs and point
Well, I’m goin’ out tonight. I’m gonna rock that joint

New improved Green Bruce:

Well, I had the carburetor, baby, thrown away
With her engine gone she’s harmless as a sack of hay
Propped her up in the backyard on fly-ash blocks
Removed the new clutch plate and the whole set of shocks
Took her down to the End-of-Life Vehicle Management Zone
I’m stayin’ home to read Kyoto Protocols

UPDATE. Mr. Bingley has gone Boss-wild in comments! “Sometimes it’s like someone took their Hummer, its engine throaty with brawn/And spent an hour doing donuts in the middle of my lawn ...”

Posted by Tim B. on 04/13/2005 at 11:20 AM
(62) CommentsPermalink
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