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HEADLINE OF THE DAY
Teen Pleads Guilty To Hiring Hit Man To Steal Block Of Cheese
Sentence: 15 years.
Here in Australia, where good Mexican food is as rare as Mexicans, I’d kill for some of that cheese!
When will Oz lift bans on raw-milk cheese imports?
Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 03 03 at 12:31 AM • permalinkNot that I begudge her one day of her sentence, but HOW do these people always seem to solicit undercover cops?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 03 03 at 12:37 AM • permalink#2 I think the Darwin Awards are for people who have caused their own death (stupidity etc) and therefore removed themselves from the gene pool.
#3 I think this was removed a few months back but don’t have a source for you. I seem to remember reading about some guy who was now able to import his favourite smelly French cheeses.
I always wondered whatever happened to Mickey’s nephews…
Posted by Jim Treacher on 2006 03 03 at 01:25 AM • permalinkSkeptic…you mean I can get Monterey Jack now? Ah, enchiladas suizas, chile rellenos…
On topic, conviction of Conspiracy or Attempted Murder do not send you the “The Ulitmate Chiropractor” in any state.
The Darwin Award would have to be for “Lifetime Achievement”
Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 03 03 at 01:33 AM • permalinkI wouldn’t kill someone for drugs.
I just might kill someone for delicious cheese.Not sure just what the plaque on the Darwin Award says, but she deserves at least honorable mention: imprisonment inhibits her DNA from being passed along to the next generation (presumably!)—which is all that matters.
Way off topic:
SIEV X tragic Tony Kevin (paraphrasing: ‘we murdered them all’) has this to say on Crikey:What is truly amazing about Howard’s callous line “They irresponsibly sank the damn boat” (SIEV 4) first, that he is just making it up – nobody knows for sure why SIEV 4 finally sank after 22 hours under circular tow by HMAS Adelaide – and secondly, Howard’s hubris. ..Why hasn’t there been a judicial inquiry as demanded by the Senate in 2002, 2003 and 2004 into what the government knew and when it knew it about how 353 asylum-seekers died when their boat sank, allegedly undetected, in Australia’s maritime border protection zone, three weeks before Howard’s November 2001 election win? They were the real “children overboard” – 146 children died on that day… (blah blah)
Dark Victory, an anti-Howard polemic by David Marr and Marian Wilkinson, says re SIEV 4 ( the ‘children overboard’ ship) on p184-191:
“Navigation charts and equipment were wrecked by either the passengers or crew as the naval party took the bridge and the engine room by force…Some of the passengers were threatening to destroy the boat and commit suicide or throw their children overboard if they could not reach Australia…
“Once the engine stopped, so had the main pumps. The board was taking water…
“….With its navigation system destroyed and its steering sabotaged, the Olong (ie SIEV IV,) was now depending on a hand-held compass…Banks sent a boarding party (from The Adelaide) to investigate. They found the engine had been sabotaged, a charge later disputed by the passengers. The cause was irrelevant at this point..…”
and soon after, the boat sank.
Of course, no-one can prove whether SIEV 4 sank from sabotage, from innate unseaworthiness, from the towing stresses, or from certain combinations of those factors.
But in most aspects of life, we judge things as plausible or not. And Howard is absolutely entitled to his assumption that
“they irresponsibly sank the damn boat.” For Kevin to say, “He (Howard) is just making it up” is outrageous. Thus one can take a guess as to how honest his SIEV X line is.
Keep in mind also, that Marr/Wilkinson were out to get Howard with their book. Their bias is in favor of the asylum seekers and their actions, so their acknowledgement of sabotage has extra force.It may be that the cocaine exception feared by Wittgenstein has occurred :
The procedure of putting a lump of cheese on a balance and fixing the price by the turn of the scale would lose its point if it frequently happened for such lumps to suddenly grow or shrink for no obvious reason.’’ Phil. Inv. 142
Oops, I’ve just got back from a sporting function here in Oz ... I’m now singing Swing Low, Sweet Chariot ... can I sing this under the shade of Sharia?
Good night ...Used in Mexican cuisine? I guess she was out to get the Big Enchilada.
#3 Re: importation of raw milk cheese.
Importation of Roquefort is now allowed, as announced by Christopher Pyne, Minister for Health and Aging (does that refer to people or cheese?) in September last year.
Other raw-milk cheeses, and presumably cocaine, appear to be still excluded, unless I’ve missed a more recent announcement.
When will Oz lift bans on raw-milk cheese imports?
The vast majority of American-made cheese is made from pasteurized milk. In fact, there is a similar import ban there.
Here in England, you can now get Welsh-made Monterey Jack from the cheese counter at Tesco.
Personally, I’ve never understood what’s so great about unpasteurized cheese. There are some cheeses I like that are only made with unpasteurized milk; but where both pasteurized and unpasteurized versions of the same cheese are available, I find that either
1) You can’t tell which is which,
or
2) The unpasteurized version tastes like someone took the pasteurized version and hung it in a cesspit for a week.
Someone should have said “Cheese it! It’s the cops!” long before now.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 03 03 at 10:27 AM • permalink#30
So by hiring a cop to do her dirty work, does that make him a feta accompli?Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2006 03 03 at 11:27 AM • permalinkI blame video games, myself. How many more people will have to die before they remove “Grand Theft Cheddar” from the store shelves?
Posted by andycanuck on 2006 03 03 at 11:28 AM • permalinkThis story makes a helluva Saga, though.
Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2006 03 03 at 11:29 AM • permalink“Not that I begudge her one day of her sentence, but HOW do these people always seem to solicit undercover cops?”
Because the undercoover cops are really good at what they do.
Besides, if she had hired a real hitman, we would be one of the usual “Four dead in mystery slaying; police believe drugs involved” headlines.
Lots of those turn out to be mistaken identities, and even stuff like borax and sugar being mistaken for drugs by desperate junkies. The only difference between stupid / funny and stupid / sad in this case was one smart undercover cop.
Posted by Tatterdemalian on 2006 03 03 at 12:45 PM • permalinkMemphis.
population of metropolitan area: 1 million.
murder rate: 1 every 3 days.
If there’s not been a murder or attempted murder, the local TV stations consider it a ‘slow news day.’Posted by daddy dave on 2006 03 03 at 01:50 PM • permalinkAnyone know if the undercover cop’s name is Wensleydale?
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 03 03 at 02:34 PM • permalinkFurther to # 19. It is actually MORE murderous to sink a boat with children on it than to throw them overbraod. On a sinking boat you tend to get dragged under by suction.
Posted by Susan Norton on 2006 03 03 at 11:05 PM • permalinkA cheese thread without the gratuous insertion of a wallace and grommit quote. How sad.
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2006 03 04 at 12:43 AM • permalinkIsn’t Wensleydale their favorite cheese? I thought my obscure reference might’ve covered W&G as well as MP.
Perhaps too obscure.
OK, so it’s a stretch.
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 03 04 at 01:39 AM • permalinkMental Floss, it’s started already, Australia’s raw milk cheese ban lifted (roquefort)
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“To stupid to live” really should be a valid diagnosis.